Have you ever tried to write an email and not use the word ‘I’ just once? Try it, you may find it is harder than you think. Also, try and speak and not use the word ‘I’, this can be a real challenge for some people, others it might actually be quite easy. What this exercise does is show you how much you speak about yourself or imply yourself into conversations or your writings. It can be a real light bulb moment. It was for me, as a person who loves to talk! Using the words, ‘I’ or ‘Me’ were scattered in my conversations. It has taken time learning to remove those words as much as possible. It isn’t always easy.
The magic for all begins, when you take the ‘Me’ or ‘I’ out and you put the ‘You’ in. What does this mean, you ask? You design your conversations and writings to shine the light on the people you are communicating with. You make them the important one. You make them feel special, the person you care about at this moment. This works in both your business life and personal life. When you practice this, the person who you are writing to or conversing with is feeling good, grateful, and special. Because of this, they want to help you and make you special too. That is magic!
Have you ever spoken with a person who is looking around at others in the room when you are having a conversation? How does it make you feel? My answer to that is: like the other person is waiting for someone better to come along. It surely doesn’t make you feel like they want to be speaking with you. Have you ever met a person who their favorite conversation is about themselves in one way or the other? They may be trying to sell you something or trying to get you to use their services and you are just turned off by their approach. We have all been there. An insurance agent I know does this all the time. He wants to sell by letting people know ‘how great he is’. No matter how much the other person may interject something, this agent has an ‘I Story’. When watching him, it makes me want to shake him and tell him to listen and stop talking. Make the other person feel heard and important. The sad thing is, there are more people selling this way than not.
On the flip side, another person in my circle owns her own successful company and has a lot that she could ‘brag’ about. However, that doesn’t enter her mind. No matter who is in front of her, every conversation is about that person standing there with her. She is asking questions about them, learning about them and making them feel heard. Her eyes are only focused on them, a matter of fact it is like she has tunnel vision. Every question answered is in a way to benefit them. She does very little talking about herself. Here is what is amazing, 85% of the time what you hear is the other party asking her about her and how they can get her service. It is so wonderful to watch. She is the example of “Taking the ‘me’ out and putting the ‘you’ in”! Can you imagine if people were asking about you and how to buy from you? It would be amazing!! It would be magical!
Now, don’t totally stop talking about yourself or your business, you do have to do some promoting. However, do it in the right way. When people ask you about what you do, answer them, however in a way you angle it back around to them and how it can benefit them. You don’t want to give them the feeling that you are avoiding telling them about yourself, just don’t do it in an ‘I am great’ way.
What are the benefits? You will attract the right people towards you. You will develop deep relationships. Best of all you may gain some new friends. You see, when you make it about others and they recognize how giving you are, when you find you need help, many will step up. Again, this is where the magic is.
My call to action to you is to ‘Take the ME Out and Put the YOU In’ to all you do. Trust me it will fill you up in ways that you have never imagined. Below, please share a story of how you found success by doing this practice. Readers can’t wait to hear them! Let the magic begin!